On Page 4 of Richard Foster’s “Celebration of Discipline,” he offers some wise insight into the inner workings of engrained sin our lives.  That it is just natural.  That left to or own, we will stir and kick up dirt and mire, and expunge it out into the world.  Why?  Because those are the kinds of things that are inside a person by nature of being a person.  In a sense, it can’t be helped.  Like the sea, so are we.  That is, apart from the battle that rages once we become a Christian.  At that point there is more than just your inner dirt maker.  You have the divine Spirit of God.  This is about what is, not what should be or how to get there.  Simply what you are, apart from divine grace.

“Isaiah 57:20 says, ‘The wicked are like the tossing sea; for it cannot rest, and its waters toss up mire and dirt.’  The sea does not need to do anything special to produce mire and dirt; that is the result of its natural motions.  This is also true of us when we are under the condition of sin  The natural motions of our lives produce mire and dirt.  Sin is part of the internal structure of our lives.  No special effort is needed to produce it.  No wonder we feel trapped.”

We’re 3 chapters short of finishing our series on the book of Judges.  We finally read what really sums the book up quite well (though it’s certainly debated).  That is that, “In those days there was no king in Israel, and every one did what was right in his own eyes.”  The statement is a big, fat, juicy, slap in the face.  It practically leaps off the pages calling our attention to everything that’s happened, which we’ve just read.

That Moses and Joshua were dead.  No one picked the mantle of leadership up for good, after them.  And the nation is in the promised land, and immediately begins to, surprise, surprise, disobey and rebell.  Rather than clear out the idolatrous nations, they became quite cozy with them.  And the cozier they were in Canaan, the more they began to look like those nations, which of course God’s point all along.  So God begins to give them over into their hands.  Israel becomes oppressed, but as of yet still cries out to God for a deliverer.  God hears, relents, and raises a deliverer to yank the yoke of slavery off of His people.  Soon, they return to their old ways, and the next time is inevitably worse than the last.

Finally we get to the last account of the Judges, who were deliverers.  We read of Samson.  Without rehashing the details, Samson from beginning to end follows his eyes wherever they lead him.  Typically to dangerous women.  Finally he meets one who gets the better of him, and he’s enslaved.  While in slavery, the man who follows the passions of his eyes, has them gouged out, so that he’s now bling.  It’s a symptom, right?  A sympton of the nation he is representing.  The point becomes, the more you follow the passions of your eyes, the more blind you will actually become.

Now as we look at the end of the book, we find that the whole thing has spread to a place of complete corruption.  Corruption in the household.  Corruption in the priesthood.  Corruption in the tribes.  And corruption in the whole of the nation.

And after the Samson narrative about spiritual blindness, we find the phrase, “There was no king in Israel and everyone did what was right in his own eyes.”  At that point, there’s no reference to following YAHWEH.  It’s all self seeking, abhorrent, degenerative actions that reveal that their hearts are truly far from God.  How will the whole thing end?  We find out in 3 weeks.  If you’ve sat through this series, I’d love to know what things really stuck out to you?  I want to go application, but my content filter is about to cut me off in a few minutes.  So I’ll leave it for another post.

It’s quiet here.  Too quiet.  There’s no baby crying.  There’s no diaper to change.  There’s no little icon of my wife asking for popsicles before bed.  There’s no one beside me at 11:21 PM in our room.  The baby monitor is off.  The night light my wife refuses to turn off, is off.  There’s nothing to wake me.  It is my house for about 6 days, but it’s not my home.  A house without my girls is not a home.  It’s the house I live in.  Sure it’s comfortable, but it’s not my life.  My life is to cuddle with my girls before bed and watch Jeapardy.  My life is to “love on” my daughter, tell a story, and put her to bed.  My life is to turn our minds off and relax to our favorite shows, curled up on the couch with an icy, with my wife.  My life is not quiet.  I like quiet, but I already miss my wife.  She’s visiting her home town in Delaware with her family.  I missed her before she left.  The whole house talks to me.  It tells me small stories of tiny details that make me long to see them.  An empty house is nothing more than bricks, siding, roofs, etc.  A home is where you live, love, and learn with your family.  I’ll trade the quiet for noise of my life anyday.

My friend Mike over at Rural Route Church, is a Rural Church advocate.  His zeal for God’s glory displayed in our often ignored, smaller, rural churches that work in the fringes of a society that is increasingly suburban and urban.  His passion is on display regularly at his blog, and it seems obvious that God has placed this fire in him concerning rural churches.  

Though not nearly as passionate as Mike, I do share his concern on this issue.  He currently has a series of posts on his blog about “Killers” in the rural church.  We may not agree on every detail, but we certainly value the same God, the same ministry, and similar contexts.  I believe some of his analysis is spot on, and so I would encourage you to stop by his blog, and take a look at the first 3 killers.  To some extent I relate to all 3, and look forward to the other 7 out a 10 part series.

I’m introspective by nature.  A navel gazer.  Self reflective.  Most times far too analytical.  I’m sure there are benefits to this, but I’m too lazy to think of what they are right now.  Very often, someone who is very introspective becomes the person who is often depressed.  In other words, too much time spent in introspection can lead to despair.  At least that’s been my experience.  Your flaws become enhanced.  The parts of you that you don’t like become exaggerated.  So you spend time in a self-induced funk.

The fastest way out of the funk is to get outside of yourself.  Stop being introspective for just a moment, and turn your gaze on someone else.  Someone in need.  Today I made three stops on a round of visitation. The first was to the local Intensive Care Unit.  One of our elderly ladies is there for the 2nd or 3rd time in a year.  Her body has been through so much trauma it is truly a wonder she is still with us.  She talked with me briefly and just cried.  She feels guilty that she is putting her family through this.  I tried to encourage her not to feel that way and prayed with her, but it’s what a mom, grandma, great grandma does.  It’s in their DNA to care for others, and not let them care for her. 

The 2nd stop was to a man who is disabled.  He is rarely able to get out, he has lost his job, and his brother in law passed away last week.  It was perfectly clear he needed someone to talk to.  Someone to be interested in him.  Someone to tell his story to.  And I was that person.  I listened, tried to encourage him, and prayed with him.  I hope he will come to our church.

The 3rd stop was to a 59 year old man who has Down’s Syndrome.  I’ve never met someone with Down’s who has lived that long.  It is God’s grace and his family’s loving care.  He was placed in a Nursing Home/Health Care facility on Monday.  He will likely never live at “home” again and really doesn’t even know why.  He can no longer eat except through a feeding tube.  He cannot do much of anything on his own.  But he knew me, and he smiled and waved when he saw me.  I gave him one of my cards (he plays with them to occupy his time).  I smiled back, talked briefly to him, and then prayed with him.  

When I finished our last visit, I was so energized I couldn’t have been depressed if I tried.  I regularly make those kinds of visits but today I saw them in a new light.  God used them to help me, and I pray help them as well.  If you get into yourself too much, you will discover what I’m writing about.  My encouragement?  Get out.  Get outside of yourself and go serve someone else.  It will not only be a blessing to them, it will go a long way towards showing you God’s grace and love in your life.

UPDATE V on 9/19/08:  Don’t know why but they gave me 5 more invites.  They may be easier to find now, but if you want one, post a comment and I’ll send it.

UPDATE IV:  No More Invites.

UPDATE III:  I have 1 more invite left, so first come first served.

UPDATE II:  I have only 2 invites left if anyone is interested, just comment.

UPDATE:  I have 4 invites left so if you stop by feel free to comment, and I’ll send it immediately (8/17/08)

I’m currently testing out one of the coolest ways I’ve yet seen to keep my files synced across computers.  It’s called Dropbox.  It’s still in beta testing mode, and is invite only, but it is well worth trying if you can get an invite.  I managed to scrounge one up, and I currently have 9 invites to give out.  If you’re interested, look up Dropbox, research its magic, and comment here with your e-mail address, and the first 9 that are interested I’ll send out an invite to.  If I already have your e-mail address just ask for it, and I’ll send it.  Follow the link in the invite to set it up, and then give it a try.  It may be a real lifesaver for me working between work and home computers.  No more e-mails to myself, zip drives, etc.  Very fast, almost instant synching.  And almost failsafe backups.  Give it a try, you may enjoy it!

What’s the deal with Peter Ruckman?  Why is he so fascinating?  I admit I’ve been drawn in a little bit from time to time.  It’s like a wreck on the side of the highway, we just can’t help but take a look.  If you don’t know who he is, be careful, curiosity may draw you in as well.  WordPress has a blog stats page that let’s you know some scant information about how people access your blog.  What links got them there.  What searches people used to find a certain post.  No matter what else may be read on this blog, EVERY SINGLE DAY someone searches for Peter Ruckman and stumbles onto a couple of posts I wrote about him.  Really. Every day.

Is it the strange, almost cult like beliefs he has about the King James Bible?  Is it the harsh, diminutive, really abusive tone he often uses to criticize others?  No one ever leaves a comment, which always leaves me wondering if they are searching for information because they agree with him, find some commonality between themselves and him, or whether they are just curious about the sheer oddity of the man’s teaching and manner?  

Sometimes the searches are hilarious.  Someone will do something like go to google and type in “i hate peter ruckman,” or “peter ruckman idiot.”  Sometimes it’s a little milder.  Just “Peter Ruckman” or “Ruckman.” From what I’ve seen, I could really up my blog stats if I would just daily do a post about Peter Ruckman. Sooo, got to keep the rubber neckers happy.  Here’s another Peter Ruckman post.

A friend of mine from seminary is the Small Groups Pastor at the Church we attended (he obviously still goes there).  His blog recently reminded me of what Sunday School/Small Groups/Home Groups/Whatever Words You Call It, prayer times can be like.  AND, more importantly what they should be like.  Take a peek and ponder how small group prayer time functions in your church.  The pitfalls are well outlined in his post, and he offers some very practical and working suggestions for making it more about prayer and less about talking about prayer.  I’ve been in both.  I much prefer more prayer and less sharing about prayer.  

My 90 year old friend from Little Mountain, and one other man later in years, meet every Sunday morning to pray before Sunday School.  I guess you could say it’s a small group?  We talk for about 2 minutes, and then hit the ground on our knees (you really ought to see two elderly men on their knees before God, and one 30 year old who they can kneel circles around).  The time is intimate, both between the 3 of us and before God.  We stand up (me rather shakily) and are energized for what lies ahead that morning.  I could not function on Sundays without this time.  I’ve had to from time to time, and there is a clear difference.  

I would encourage every small group of whatever name designation to do more praying and less talking about praying.  You will find it will make a tangible difference in the life of your group, and in your own life personally.

Today I was craving an icy.  I regularly do in the summertime.  Those great gas station concoctions.  I pulled into a fuel city in a rush, and of course on the phone.  I got out with the phone still in my hand and on my way into the gas station I was throwing away a drink cup from lunch.  The phone was in the same hand.  You can see where this is going, right?  Of course it couldn’t land on some fluffy trash at the top of the can, but instead dropped like a lead balloon straight to the bottom of the big, nasty can.  At first I didn’t realize what just happened, but it dawned quickly enough and so I start digging through gas station trash! When I finally get to the bottom of the can, there is the phone in a pool of some sort of liquid (I’ll tell myself it was water).  

So I get the phone out, and rush to the bathroom, already in a hurry b/c my wife is heading out to a ladies night at a local church with some of our church’s ladies, and I’m baby sitter for the night.  I disgustedly wipe it off with paper towels (the rough brown, rolled out ones).  I don’t know protocol for a water damaged phone so I do what I came to find out was the wrong thing.  I start pushing lots of buttons, trying to turn it on and off, etc.  The screen starts flashing and goes blank.  

I buy my icy for a $1.40, and wait in line for it for probably 3 hours it felt like.  Then I rush home thinking, “I’ll just plug it back in and wait for a charge to come back.”  Searching the net for similar experiences, while trying to feed my 8 month old, make my 2 year old eat, and sort of eating myself, I discover that I’ve done exactly the wrong thing.  You should take the battery out immediately, leave everything uncovered, drying any water you see, and leave it off while the components dry out.  If you’re lucky it will come back on.  My iPod did after a dip in the bathtub.  

I run back to the phone and after removing the cover I notice a pungent smell.  Like hot tires, and hear a slight hissing sound like eggs frying.  ”This is not good!  Not good at all,” I think.  So I call Verizon, of course I have no insurance, and they empathetically tell me there’s nothing they can do.  My only option is to purchase a new phone.  This one is less than 2 months old, but I used my upgrade discount on it, paying $100 (it’s the new Palm Centro for Verizon).  

So after all of this mess, I borrowed my dad’s old Motorola Rzr (which I’d sworn off Motorola after bad battery experiences with the Q).  I’m waiting until my wife gets home to activate it, and hoping and praying that my Centro will come back on in a day or two.  I did try again, and the phone came on, only with no screen.  So it’s not completely dead, maybe?  So today, long story short, I paid $101.40 for an icy, and to top it all off;  It wasn’t even that good.  Not solid enough in its texture.  Friends, the moral of this story is don’t throw things away with the same hand you’re holding anything important in.  AND, when you’re in a hurry to get home don’t stop for an icy.

A few of you clicked onto the link I gave for the family blog my wife updates.  It was the wrong blog!  Sorry. Here’s the link to the correct one!